Pathetic

The only thing I like about teaching really is that I get to be popular in school... among teenage kids. Pathetic.

Sometimes, well kind of often actually, I rehearse job interviews in my head while I'm waiting on the bus and things like that. I try to figure out exactly what I'm going to say to my interviewer. In what way I will be able to use Korea to get a job doing something besides teaching. I can't just assume because I left the country that companies will even think it's a big deal. It's easy to travel and live out of the country nowadays. I have to really get things accomplished here if I want it to work. I need to finish my book. I need to start practicing my Spanish and Korean. I need to study computers and auto mechanics (that last one's just for me). I need to figure out specifically what I plan to do when I get back. I mean, for a career. I would say I need to straighten myself out, but that's not really something I'm working on as much as something I just expect to happen. I feel good about it already. I'm on my period now and I didn't get depressed at all this month. I felt a little down, but it was totally no big deal. I think it helps that I'm anticipating the exact day now. Before I could feel it coming and I knew it was close, but it would take so long that the downer stuff would start to get to me and I couldn't help it. This time when I was getting down I couldn't even mope if I wanted to. And a lot of shit happened to really test me. All of the shit at work, that is. But when I started feeling sad I couldn't really even get sad because it felt fake because I knew it was my period. I couldn't even cry. I was just kind of melancholy but in a weird Prozac kind of way.

Anyway, we'll see what happens next month.